Resistance Is Futile...Or Is It?

Thoughts on...

Dancing, Dating and Life’s Lessons

~by Carmen Champagne

Over the years I’ve developed a sound belief that there are only three options available when life hands you lemons (well, four, if you count making lemonade):

1. Change yourself.
2. Change the situation – this means altogether removing yourself from it.
3. Change your mind – in other words, your attitude. Just quit fighting the inevitable and accept the lemons. Fully. Zero resistance.

While I’ve done my share of all three, it is the practice of letting go of resistance that is always foremost on my mind. So imagine my surprise when Tobi began our third lesson with an exercise in — of all things — resistance!

“In dance,” he explained, “You need to offer some resistance to your partner in order to feel where they are leading you. “

Ha! The irony of this statement struck me as too funny.

But then I thought, well, perhaps that might explain a few things about my lack of skill as a dancer (and dare I say a dater, as well). Either total resistance or none at all.

Tobi brought me to the wall in the studio, and had me stand in front of it, palms outward in front of me, touching nothing but air. Alternately, I was made to touch the wall by moving forward on the balls of my feet until my palms met with just the slightest of resistance. Could I feel the difference, he wanted to know. This insightful exercise taught me that a certain amount of resistance is not only good, but is absolutely necessary if you want to dance with a partner. Hmmm…

Tobi got his point across — and scored some extra points from me besides! This eye-opening moment revealed itself as the dawning of another of life’s lessons.

The rest of our time was spent going over the basics of tango. My new found knowledge in place, I confidently followed along as Tobi explained the steps. The character of the tango comes to life when dramatic flair is added to it. My love for all things theatrical made me a more than willing participant.

Well, folks, although I’m going to play it a little cool…show a little resistance:) but I really think I have met the dance of my dreams…

Tune in for my very first group lesson on Friday, February 3^rd on the next episode of Champagne Social!

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To watch previous episodes of Champagne Social on our Youtube Channel.