Tuesday, November 25, 2008

My Golden Dancers

Bringing Brass to Gold

By Elita Sohmer Clayman

On a television show, a young man was bringing a bouquet of flowers to the young lady he was taking to dinner. He looked at her all dressed up and appearing so pretty and said: “Bringing these flowers to you is like bringing brass to gold.” He meant that the flowers were inexpensive like something that is made from brass, and she was as beautiful as gold.

Many times in our lives we start out with brass and it turns into gold. Plenty of things we do emanate from inexpensive accoutrements to become golden to us. So many folks start ballroom dancing by taking one or two group lessons with lots of other people they do not know. Then they perhaps advance to taking lessons with only one partner or by themselves with their teacher as their partner. Finally, all this turns into something golden. Gold being the high standard of jewelry other than platinum is what we want when we buy good jewelry. What we want when we dance is to be golden in our perception of our self and our partner. We want other people to look and say ‘Wow, they dance so well. They must have been dancing for years.’ Dancing is something that always stays with you and like typing, bowling, or driving a car, it never leaves your brain.

I have been to lots of dances where you see a couple who have advanced since the last time you saw them months ago. Some people dance and others are not dancers. The ones who dance are looked upon as being unique and exciting. They are admired, appreciated, and applauded.

John Travolta was revered in many movies because he danced well in them and people thought of him as the young kid in 'Welcome Back Kotter,' an old television show. He was on 'The View' and said he turned down several movie scripts in the past that went onto be big hits. He was sorry he had not taken the opportunity to be in those movies. He said he did not think he could do the show or movie and later realized he would have done well in them and he regretted it. The movie 'Hairspray' was given to him and he turned it down at first and then knew it was for him - lo and behold, it was a mega-hit.

Some of us turn down doing things because we feel we cannot handle it now because we are seniors. I have always felt that the word 'seniors' did not conjure up a very impressive meaning about us. When I was in high school, I could not wait to become a senior. When I was in college, I could not wait to become a senior. As I approached any thing, I wanted to do it in a senior manner, meaning a superior manner. Now the word 'senior' is another word for an elderly person.

We seniors should be called something else. We could be named 'elegant elders,' 'respected retirees,' or 'super sages.' Senior citizens mean we are oldsters and citizens of this earth. We are people who have reached this age, hopefully with some wisdom, and become grandparents. Some are travelers and others excel in a hobby like ballroom dancing. Many are satisfied to sit on their tushies, watch television and munch and become sedentary. Many of us combine grandparenting, traveling, and also practice our ballroom dancing weekly.

That is not what we elegant elders want to be known as. We want to be recognized as respected sages with lots of wisdom earned through living, loving, liking, and doing. We desire to be looked up to and not looked down at because we are older. In Asian and European countries, elders are more honored than in our country. Many seniors here are looked upon as burdens to their families rather than exquisite persons of vision for the memories they tell their children from the days of yore.

When I was a youngster, I never cared about hearing much of my parents’ past or the ‘olden days.’ Now the olden days are my past and my children are very interested in hearing stories from yesteryear. Lord Byron said the past is the prophet of the future. I am the last member of my immediate family which consisted of mom, dad, brother and me. They are gone and I have stories and family tidbits stored in my senior brain. My daughter loves to hear all the information I have about these events. My nephew who lives in California wanted me to write down family history so he could pass it on to his son.

Memories need not be enhanced. Most of them are so interesting when you look back on them, though nothing much worthwhile to you at that time long ago when they happened. Now it appears to be bringing brass to gold. The brass being the past and the gold being now and the future. By retelling these stories of the passage of time, we relive those moments and they may not have been so golden then but retelling them now makes it a happening. We can learn from the past and can beautify our present and our future remembering how it was then. We did not have control over things then as we have now with all this modern technology. My older grandsons can go on their computers and converse and play games with friends. They are in their homes and their friends are in their homes and the two meet via the computer. Who would have thought this amazing happening would transpire?
I worked 50 years ago as an administrative assistant to the president of a printing firm. We were amazed when they got the first Xerox copy machine. The artist who worked in our place need no longer make two copies of any artwork. Before, he required one for his office and one for the client. So he labored hard to make identical copies. It took hours of work. When the machine was delivered, we all stopped to admire this piece of modernization. Howard, the artist said: 'Amen.' His work was easier, more precise, and less time consuming. Modern miracles had happened at this printing facility.
I remember the day I spent $25 and bought my mom and dad an electric can opener. It cost so much money they did not want to accept the gift. We oohed and ahhed over the cans automatically and neatly being opened. My dad took the empty can and turned it over and opened the underside just for fun - to see it move. I can see it as if it happened yesterday.

We were so thrilled at these small wonders. Look how things are now with computers, iPods, DVDs, videos, cell phones, etc. We super sages and elegant elders can help our children, grandchildren and friends by relating what life was then. We survived, we were happy, and most of all we respected each other and our elders. Now we are the elders and we are elegant and super and we want our younger population to realize that. We were brass and now we are golden and we have lots of time left to continue being golden. When we dance before younger people, we show them that gold is better than brass and age is ageless.

Regardless of whether you are a senior now or will be a senior soon or even if you are in your 30s, 40s, 50s, you can learn to dance and to dance beautifully. Dancing not only enhances your thoughts about yourself and your ability to learn, it becomes a distinctive part of your existence. John Dryden said, “Dancing is poetry of the foot.” Not only is it lively legs, it is an instance of pure movement.

My fifteen-month-old 4th grandchild, Ava Maya, turns on her toy machine and out comes some very pretty music. At her young age, she sits on the floor and moves her body to the music she hears. It is as if it is inborn to her to know that she can shake and move because of what she hears. Perhaps it is in her genes because her Grammie loves to dance.

So go out and take some dance lessons, engage in dance activities at the studio, and become so involved that you have something down on your weekly calendar showing that you are participating in the dance world.

Dear seniors - or shall I say elegant elders, respected retirees and almost seniors and just everybody out there - remember and realize that we are still valuable, vigorous, and full of vision regardless of age. We have the vision for now and the vision of the past. Both the now and the past make us golden persons moving to platinum. In jewelry, platinum is the ultimate and we will remain so all the days of our lives.

If dance is poetry of the foot or feet, then it is also a depiction of our body. The movement of our bodies with its parts and our feet and legs becomes
a ladder for us to climb. As we reach the top rung, our hearts are full of happiness, our mind is full of mental activity, and our souls are replete with fulfillment of this accomplishment we have attained. Someone once said the body is a machine that winds its own springs.

It is a stunning consummation of the learning process regardless of age. Age is only a number and numbers add up to total success. Success is what we all strive for from the beginning of our knowledgeable years. Children cannot wait until they are older. They often tell their age as six and a half, ten and three quarters, because they yearn to be older. Older people sometimes fib about their age; others are proud to say they are so many years old, etc.

The ultimate compliment one likes to hear is: ‘You do not look that age.’
The paramount tribute to our self is to participate in our own life, not in someone else’s life. Turn the ordinary into the extraordinary because people climb a mountain in different ways. We all accomplish the goal.

So move your body like my little darling granddaughter does; have poetry with your feet; leave the brass behind and become platinum in your dancing. Climb that mountain and reach the top because your life will be quite meaningful every day as you dance to higher pinnacles than you ever thought possible.

Always keep dancing.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Elita,
you yourself are truly gold. enjoyed this so much and so encouraging to a senior

Anonymous said...

I love platinum better than white gold but it is very expensive. So after reading your article, I now know that I can be platinum in my dancing at my Fred studio where I take lessons weekly private. Thanks Mrs. Clayman for letting me believe I am gold-platinum.What an interesting thought that is. I love reading your articles on the Fred newsletter blog and I went and read a few on the www.Rene site. All great..

Anonymous said...

Interesting and informative

Anonymous said...

Very informative and well written. Melba from New York State

Am thinking of trying ballroom dancing. will see if I can find a Fred Astaire studio in NY. thanks for stimulating my interest.